


Looking For Right Now

by RealMagicQueen



Category: Looking (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-30
Updated: 2017-08-02
Packaged: 2018-09-21 00:00:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9521801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RealMagicQueen/pseuds/RealMagicQueen
Summary: Even when it seems sure, happily ever after doesn't happen so fast.





	1. Now what?

They all stood outside the restaurant.

"Now what?" Agustin asked, turning towards his man.

"Home," Doris said. "I need to see Malik before he leaves for work tomorrow morning- I mean this morning. We are already in today, aren't we? I mean today is Monday or tomorrow or whatever."

"See Malik?" Dom teased. "To give him a farewell kiss at the door before he heads out to face the big bad men at City Hall?"

"Yeah, and a quick blow job for good luck."

The others laughed except for the newlyweds who were snogging and murmuring nonsense to each other.

Patrick glanced sideways at Richie. They were standing shoulder to shoulder but not actually touching. Both had their hands in the pockets of their jackets.

It was a cold night - morning.

"Well, I need to get some sleep before I open the Window tomorrow," Dom said. He had one arm wrapped around Doris' shoulders.

"Yeah, me and this one need to go consummate our wedding,” Agustin intoned, rubbing his nose against his husband's.

“Well that depends on if we can still manage to get it up,” Eddie replied.

“Hey!” Austin pulled away with a slightly wounded look on his face.

Eddie drew him back in with one large arm. “I’m exhausted, okay? Happy but exhausted. We could have a wedding night cuddle.”

Agustin melted against his husband again, bussing the Italian bear on the lips.

There was a brief moment where the others smiled indulgently as they watched the lovers. Then as if previously choreographed, four heads simultaneously turned towards Patrick and Richie.

No, five. Richie was looking at Patrick too but turned to gaze at the empty street.

“What?” Patrick humphed at the others.

Agustin raised his eyebrows. Patrick squinted in reply.

“So I’m going to walk Doris home,” Dom said, giving Patrick a meaningful look. He turned Doris around and they started to walk in the direction of the nearest station.

“Goodnight, my loves,” Doris called over their merged shoulders before coming back to give the four remaining men quick kisses then rushed back to her waiting best friend. All the while Dom stared at Patrick, trying to convey some message with his eyes.

“We’ll come with you,” Eddie said to Doris, pulling Agustin along.

“Goodnight,” the smaller man sing-songed, sweeping one arm in an arc over his head and down to his side, and blew kisses at Patrick and his morose love.

When they were alone, Patrick shyly turned towards Richie

“Now what?” he asked, tentatively reaching out for his ex-boyfriend and once again new love.

Richie looked down, caught Patrick's hand. He gave the clearly anxious man a quick kiss on the cheek. He inclined his head in the opposite direction from where the others had headed.

“Let’s walk.”


	2. Your Place or Mine?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every step seemed to take them closer yet further away.

They had been walking in silence for about five minutes, hands locked together, Richie looking straight ahead, Patrick stealing glances at him.

The streets were empty, with one or two stragglers like them, heading off home from a night out. They passed a man bent before a shop front window. He looked like he was opening up his business to a new day.

Richie stopped at a corner beside a traffic light post. He looked left , right and then left again, - even though the pedestrian light showed green -waiting for some invisible car to pass.

"What's wrong? " Patrick asked quietly.

Richie glanced at him, turned away, and let out a long sigh. "We can't go to my place."

"Why?" Patrick replied with a snort-chuckle .

Richie’s next words were rushed and at the same time, stilted. "Brady could be there. We haven't exactly moved in together. Just that, he stays over at my place a lot, got some things there, wear my clothes sometimes- like last night.

"He was pretty drunk when we left the End Up... And angry - no upset." Richie rubbed his face with one hand, which he also ran through his hair. The other hand was clutching the finger tips of Patrick's right hand. "He may have gone back to my place. Maybe thinking this night is not real. Maybe just some bad dream..."

"Is it, Richie?" Patrick placed a hand on Richie’s face to still his movements .

“Is what?” Richie replied, slightly leaning away from Patrick's touch .

“This night. This. All this. Us. Is it real?”

Richie looked down, letting go of Patrick’s hand. He put his back in his pockets, sighed.

Patrick felt his heart freeze.

When Richie’s eyes met Patrick's, they were piercing, searching for something in Patrick's baby blues.

Patrick gathered all the feelings in his heart, displaying them in the brimming orbs for his true love to see.

“Yes, Pato,” Richie said finally, his voice firm. “It’s real.”

Then he lost it again. He rubbed his hands against his eyes – up and down.

“Shit, Pato!” he mumbled against his palms.

“Okay." Patrick grabbed Richie by the shoulders this time to steady him. “We don’t go to your place. We go to my place, Dom’s place.”

Richie's sad eyes glittered from unshed tears. He looks so helpless, Patrick thought. Not helpless, overwhelmed.

The taller man smiled, hoping his eyes held all the assurance he wanted to convey to the beautiful man before him.

Richie grabbed him by the face and crushed his lips in a desperate kiss. After what seemed like hours, their mouths separated with a wet pop as they came up for air.

Patrick pressed his face into Richie’s inhaling his lover’s essence, never wanting to let go. They stood like that for a long moment, their foreheads pressed together, exchanging breaths.

“I think this time we should take it slow,” Richie said finally.

Patrick squeezed his eyes shut. He battled to stay a myriad negative thoughts from pushing to the front of his brain.

Richie raised his head. Patrick hurried to don a bland look.

“Sure.” His smile felt like a grimace . Richie’s drooped at the ends. What a depressing pair we make, Patrick was thinking before Richie looped an arm through his.

Hope stirred.

“Let’s go to your place and have our own wedding night cuddle.”

Patrick chuckled, then as he continued to stare at Richie ‘s face, the sound morphed into a full on laugh. He felt the tightness around his chest loosen.

“Yes.” His smile was brilliant. “Let’s.”


	3. No Lingering Doubts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My boyfriend, Patrick thought. It was not like it had been with Kevin. Then it had almost always sounded like a question especially in his head: "My boyfriend?"

Patrick wasn't big on PDA, a holdover from when he was a closeted kid in Denver. But on the train ride home, he couldn't resist touching Richie, stroking his hand, leaning his tired head on Richie's shoulder and when he felt Richie lips on his hair, looking up to kiss him back. 

My boyfriend, he thought. It was not like it had been with Kevin. Then it had almost always sounded like a question especially in his head: "My boyfriend?"

They were mostly silent, fatigued from the long day. Patrick sensed the protective wall the raven-haired man still had around him. He was eager to knock it down, profess his full commitment this time. It all felt awkward on the surface. But that was just on the surface. Patrick felt around inside for some turmoil but there was none. Only this warm glow, this rightness.

_This is where I should have always been, here with this guy._

But Patrick being Patrick still felt a need to lay it all out in the open so there was no confusion and it was all concrete. He only remained quiet because he had spent months trying to get rid of that Patrick, the one who overanalysed everything and ended up ruining it all. He wasn't going to ruin anything this time, he wasn't!

They got off the train and walked to Patrick's old building. As they went up the stoop, their eyes met.

"What?" Richie asked, smiling.

"Nothing," Patrick giggled.

He took the key from his pocket but fumbled putting it in the lock. Richie took the key from him. Patrick wrapped his arms around Richie from behind. He inhaled the sweet smell of the product in Richie's well-coiffed hair, dropped a kiss on his neck. Richie opened the door and staggered in under Patrick's weight. They both laughed.

“You drunk, Pato?” Richie teased.

Patrick only just stopped himself from replying: “Yeah, drunk in love.”

They went up the stairs, Patrick's arm around Richie’s shoulder, Richie’s around Patrick’s waist.

“Shit,” Patrick said just as he opened the apartment door.

“What?”

“We'll have to sleep in Agustin’s old bedroom.”

“Oh?”

Patrick shuddered. Richie snorted, grinning.

“I know you are tired but you might have to wait while I change the sheets. With Agustin, you never know.”

Richie laughed outright. Patrick put a finger to his lips. He stealth-walked to his - Dom’s bedroom door. Richie followed a few moments later.

Patrick stopped at the edge of the doorway and peered in. He turned around, started to speak, recoiled, startled to find Richie so close behind him. The other man grinned. Patrick pulled him close, laughing.

“I think we were meant to be here all along.”

“Why?” Richie asked, peering around him into the bedroom.

“Dom’s probably crashing at Doris and Malik’s,” he explained. 

Richie leaned into him, pressing him up against the wall. “Remember this place?” His brown eyes turned molten with the memory.

“Uh, what? Oh!” Patrick blushed. “It was here we had our first kiss.”

“Yeah and you tried to knock me out.” He took Patrick by the hand and pulled him into the bedroom.

“What? No.”

Richie’s back was turned towards Patrick as he mentally took stock of the changes in the room. Morning light filtered in from the backyard.

“Come." He tugged at Patrick’s hand. They moved to the side of the bed where Richie sat down to pull off his sneakers before collapsing backwards. Patrick lay beside him, one hand over Richie’s heart.

“What time do you leave tomorrow?”

“Today. Around 6. I knew I would need to get over a hangover so I took a day off. Should have made it two.”

Richie’s drooping eyelids came up all the way. He took Patrick's face and started to kiss him. Patrick revelled in the familiar taste of his old lover's lips. He moaned.  
Richie moved over him, deepening the kiss. They both made mewling sounds.

Patrick could no longer stop himself. He broke the delicious spittle-exchange, his chest heaving. Richie, hair tousled, lips red and swollen, cocked his head to the side.

“We don’t have to do this right now.”

Richie groaned, falling back on the bed. “Really, Pato.”

Patrick leaned over him, running a hand over Richie’s chest. They were both still fully dressed, he realised, like it was one small detail he had lost notice of in the heat of their heavenly kiss.

“Yes. Really. You are right. We need to take it slow. We have been here before. It’s nothing new for us. It’s not something we have to rush into. I know this night has been kind of overwhelming for you, breaking up with Brady- a guy you say you were not in love with but still you dated for a year-“

“Pato...”

“And then getting back with me almost immediately. I love you. There is no doubt about that in my mind and I know you love me too. It’s not all questions like it was with Kevin –“

“Pato...” Richie raised his head from the bed then let it flop back again as Patrick marched on through his desperate monologue.

“This is definite. It’s happening. It’s real. So if you need time to figure out how we proceed, maybe tie some loose ends with Brady, I understand. I won’t panic and run away or doubt you. I love you, Richie. I’m in love with you. I waited this long to get this second chance. I could still wait. A little longer.”

Richie had put a hand over his eyes. Now, he removed it.

“A little. How little?”

“A week. Three days. Till l get to Denver.”

Richie snorted. He shook his head, pulling Patrick down to him. Patrick listened to Richie’s steady heartbeat.

“What about Texas?”

Patrick's head came up, his eyes shining. “I meant it. I’’ll come with you.”

Richie smiled. He pulled at Patrick's cheek before cupping it. Patrick turned his head to kiss Richie's hand. His lover's brown eyes melted. Patrick was warmed by what he saw in them.

“I think I wanted to leave San Francisco so much because you were not here," Richie confessed. "Before you left, even though I was with Brady, I could still see you around, hang out with you, wait for you to realise what a mess that thing you had with Kevin was.”

“Hey!”

“Then you went home and somehow I started to feel lonely. And even though, outwardly, things seemed to be looking up for me - I had a steady boyfriend, I was finally doing my own thing - just didn’t seem enough. There was something missing."

Patrick reached up to place a soft lingering kiss on Richie's cheek.

“If it's any consolation life was meaningless for me too without you. At a point, it seemed all I was doing was trying to justify all the stupid choices I was making. Paramount of which was letting you go. I should have followed you after that speech you made on my stoop, and forced you to give us a chance back then."

Richie sighed. "Yeah, I know."

Their kiss this time was less intense, but filled with as much warmth.

“Let’s go to bed,” Richie said when they broke apart. “Don't want you to be too jetlagged when you get to Denver.”

“What time is it?” Patrick asked, at the same time checking his phone. “7:15. We still got time.”

“Yeah, if we nap now. We need to make this official somehow..."

“Oh,” Patrick grinned as they both got up to undress. "I probably won't sleep a wink with that thought."

Richie struck his butt. They play wrestled but managed to undress without heating things up. They were really fagged out from all the drinking, dancing and emotions.

When they finally got into bed, Richie reached for Patrick. They cuddled close, foreheads rubbing, looking for comfortable angles.

“I love you, Pato,” Richie sighed, eyes closed.

Patrick felt something in his heart explode and he imagined a beautiful starburst raining complete joy everywhere.

He smiled, tearing up. "I love you too," he whispered, and watched Richie smile with his eyelids now glued shut, his breath slowing to a steady rythym.

Fin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, kudos and comments.


	4. Bonus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sexy sex.

Patrick woke up at about two in the afternoon. His eyes opened to behold the plain mysteriously stained ceiling. For a few seconds he was disoriented, wondering where he was. He sensed the presence of someone else in bed with him. Just at that moment, Richie heaved a huge breath, snuffling loudly. Patrick turned on his side, a wistful smile pulling at the edges of his lips. It all came back to him, all the events of last night and this morning.

He contemplated Richie's scruff lined face, his body swarmed with the most tingly feelings. He stretched out a hand and scratched Richie's jaw. Unable to resist and not caring about morning breath, especially one heralded by a night of heavy drinking and eating greasy food, he clamped his lips on his lover's. It was meant to be a buss but soon he was sucking at Richie's lower lip, drawing his boyfriend's mouth open enough to lick his way in. Richie gasped, pulling away slightly as he awakened. His bleary eyes caught Patrick's impish ones before Patrick went back to chomping on his lips like some starved castaway who had found land and food again.

Richie laid back as Patrick clambered over him, licking, sucking, biting, moaning like he was eating the best pizza ever. Soon, Richie was responding with equal fervor. He ran his hand through Patrick's hair, nibbled at his jaw, his neck. Patrick moved down Richie's body, plastering open-mouthed kisses on the raven-haired man's torso as he went along. He got to Richie's crotch, pulled the boxers down slightly and buried his face in the dark musty hairs there, inhaling deeply. He peppered Richie's penis with kisses as he slowly freed it. Just before, he encased the tip in his mouth, he looked up to catch Richie's eyes. Maintaining eye contact, he sucked his lover's dick into his mouth, tugging hard with his tongue. Richie moaned and his eyes glazed over. He clutched at the bed sheets. Patrick reached up and grabbed his hands in his instead.

He revelled in the taste of Richie's dick, licking, sucking, nibbling. He slurped up the pre-cum, holding it on his tongue for a moment, savouring its taste. He pulled off Richie's boxers completely and dealt with his before coming back up to lie beside his lover. Richie watched him closely. Patrick felt like he could drown in the molten depths of his lover's eyes.

"Why did you stop?"

Patrick grabbed Richie's hand as it stroked his face and held it to his cheek before planting a kiss in the palm. "I want you to fuck me."

"Right now?"

"Yes, right now."

Richie smiled. "Turn around."

Patrick flopped on his stomach.

Richie rummaged in the drawers beside the bed, looking for some lube.

"I don't think Dom has any lube... or condoms ," he announced.

Patrick groaned, inwardly cursing Dom and his self-enforced celibacy. Richie knowing the import of Patrick's request, understood the desire to make their brief time together before leaving for Denver a moment. But before Patrick could make any desperate suggestions, he leaned in to kiss him, rubbing his hands lightly down his body.

"I was really enjoying that blowjob," he whispered. 

Patrick side-eyed him. They had agreed to take it slow.  Their big moment could wait till a time when it didn't feel contrived or rushed and could be drawn out for as long as possible. He conceeded. "Let's make it one you'll remember long after I'm gone."

He got back to his knees to make good on his promise. In a few minutes, he had Richie struggling to pull away from their clutched hands so he could grab at Patrick's head as he screamed, "Pato."

Mission accomplished, Patrick lay alongside Richie, watching the rise and fall of his lover's chest. He licked his lips, relishing the taste of Richie's cum. Richie's eyes popped open. He pounced on Patrick who squealed in mock fear. 

"Now, it's my turn," Richie growled.

There were more blow jobs in the shower. Patrick even got the chance to show Richie his newly acquired and much-refined ass-eating skills to his lover's extreme delight.

"What's the time?" he asked, brushing his hair in front of the mirror while Richie watched from the bed. 

"Four-thirty."

"Four-thirty! Oh I'm gonna miss my flight."

"I could drive you."

Patrick walked to the bed and pulled Richie to his feet. He pecked him on the nose. "Much as I would love to see the barber truck, it is a long drive both ways added to a detour. I should call a Uber, like right now."

While he searched for his phone, Richie noticed a note stuck to the mirror. He read it aloud. "Hey, sleepyhead. Maybe you could drop by at the window before you leave. Dom."

"I guess it's too late for that right now," Patrick quipped, dialling Uber. "He could have woken us up when he came in. Why didn't we wake up?"

Richie shrugged, stealing a kiss for no reason. 

They were both standing at the bottom of the stoop with the Uber guy watching from the car. Patrick leaned his forehead against Richie's. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"Don't change your mind," Patrick choked out, eyes closed.

Richie held his face, waited till he opened his eyes. "I won't."

"Promise?"

Richie nodded. "I promise."

An impatient sound from the Uber driver intruded on their world, forcing Patrick to draw away from his lover's grasp but not before kissing those strong hands. He got into the back of the Uber. Richie leaned in to kiss him one last time. "Call me."

Patrick nodded, his throat suddenly constricted with emotion. He tried to blink away the tears. And as the Uber pulled away, he called out as loudly as he could, "I love you, Richie Donado Ventura."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rushed. But hope you still enjoyed it. :)

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic. 
> 
> I know next to nothing about San Francisco so pls disregard actual locations/directions/means of transport. Imagine this is an alternate universe San Francisco. :)


End file.
